Suppose someone asked you to describe the kind of person you are. Easy enough, right? Humbly, you might start by listing your most admirable qualities, like how much you care about others and your ongoing quest for self-development. You might think to balance your self-conception with awareness of your less admirable qualities, so you confess your dislike of cats.
However, there’s a deeper layer to this: while there may be truth in what we articulate about ourselves, it’s worth considering how well we truly know ourselves. What’s on the surface of our awareness might not tell the full story. This is where the philosopher’s challenge—to “know thyself”—comes into play. What appears to be a straightforward task—understanding ourselves—may actually be far more complex. We often assume that our self-perception reflects an accurate and complete picture, but in reality, what we believe about ourselves is based on limited knowledge—similar to mistaking the tip of an iceberg for the iceberg itself. There’s much about ourselves we do not understand.
Take our motivations, for example. We might believe we're pursuing a goal out of genuine passion or dedication. However, beneath the surface, hidden influences, fears, societal pressures, or personal insecurities may actually be driving us. This deeper complexity can obscure our self-awareness, making it difficult to see beyond our biases and needs.
Understanding why we do what we do in life isn’t always straightforward. For instance, imagine you see yourself as a noble, self-sacrificing individual. This view is integral to your sense of self. What if you felt that your sacrifices were neither acknowledged nor appreciated? An inner conflict would call for a resolution, but what would you be resolving? You might grapple with whether to adjust your self-image or focus on the external validation problem. In choosing how to resolve this conflict, you reveal what drives you. Your decision—whether to adjust your self-image, seek external validation, or some combination of these—reveals something about you, your motivation, who you really are.
Such dissonance forces you to confront the truth about yourself—whether your self-image is shaped by a willingness to be honest with yourself or distorted by a need for external validation.
The key takeaway is that self-awareness is never fully achieved. Biases, needs, and fears constantly distort your perception. To begin to get close to understanding yourself, you must challenge your assumptions, critically examine your motivations, and accept honest feedback. These actions are essential to bridging the gap between how you see yourself and the reality of who you are.
© copyright 2024 Steven Robert Young. All rights reserved.
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